AHHHH!!!!

Dude, so ok. Tonight culminated in the best evidence ever that i deserve to be in hell.
A back story:
At my restaurant, there hangs out a drug dealer, and his "brother" Very nice people, salt of the earth. And of course, they were hanging out tonight, they decided to go to 6th street. They invited me, since i had just gotten off, and theyre a fun crowd. Now, i figured id be boozing it up with the best of them on the fat tuesday. That's today, right? It is. So i was thinking id be privvy to all that breast-viewing that is associated with the date. Wrong! We never left the car, and instead "rolled" around "holla-ing" at girls who were walking around. I think they're also called shorties.





Fun Fact: Did you know that black people (or homies) claim to like all different kinds of music, yet only listen to one song?


One more: White people enjoy generalizing almost as much as line dancing.

Sadly, i saw none of this action.

My night was destined to one of captivity, as we rolled around the foot traffic near 6th, and listened to ONE song over and over, and listened to the subtle art of the african-american male's dance of flirtation

"Hey, girl! I like the way yo jeans is, I wanna jump dat bump, nawhatisayin'??"

"You like Movies? I got that new funny one, nawhatisayin'???"

Frankly, i think i learned a lot.

Oh, so here why im going to hell. Its really cause i was an accessory to debauchery. But its a slippery slope. The scene is the same as ive described, rolling along, slouching in the back seat, and verbally-sexually-assaulting girls.
We get to this one traffic light, and music's blaring, and this homeless woman is getting wheeled around by a homeless man. Presumably, they are married. At this light (the song by the way talks exclusively about having big rims on your car, and cops being stupid or something) this lady of the streets recognizes this song, and begins rocking out to it, pointing to her spokes everytime that the rapper shouts something about wheels. which is a lot. FInally, the guy riding shotgun calls over to her "show us yo' laffy taffy" which is ghetto-slang for "give me a piece of candy, its halloween" She laughs and shakes her head no. He then shouts "TITS!!"

And she immediately lifts her shirt. Her husband looks on, horrified. The whole car cheers. Including me. But i was real quiet, in case god was watching. The guy quickly wheels the girl away, he was mad. It looked like there was gonna be a huge fight when they get home. oopsies, thats not funny

it kinda is.

So, that was my brief flirtation with being part of a "crew" Nothing like derelict debauchery to cleanse the soul.

Have a super one, folks

steve