....
my head hurts. alot. this isnt going to be very entertaining. im probably gonna follow my original planned form on this, and exaggerate my exploits and bitch about how i'm not meeting girls (Ive actually heard "im pregnant" used as an excuse not to talk to me)
Girls: who needs em?
me. the girls here are sooo very nice looking, i fall in love honestly every two minutes when i see any girl. ANY girl. desperation, thy name be steve. no, im not gonna commit any sex crimes (probably) cause thankfully, its getting to be winter time, and they're wrapping up all their juicy presents in coats and sweaters. (i gagged a little typing that)
this phenomen is dangerous. As i have been frequently informed, Austin is the number one place for my demographic to get aids. (my doctor told me most bluntly; "wrap your tool, cause that shit'll getcha".....which is horrifying in and of itself, before you stop and consider my doctor is also my father....)
so, if i want to avoid the junky-plague, ive got to take precautions. after i put my wallet through the wash, i noticed that the rubber i keep in my wallet (i figure a friend might need it, i know i wont) had the packaging warped and was letting air into it. rather that say, "eh...probably works fine" i instead threw it out. Is this a new leaf for Big Boy Steve? p'raps
I also think that preventation starts at the source. so from now on, i need to have a wingman at the bar (im taking applicants now) who comes armed with a stun gun. when i start chatting up some hoodrat who has sores on her mouth and bruises on her arms, my wingman will reach over, and shock me in the raspberries.
Cause that makes much more sense than self-restraint.
cause lets face it, that aint gonna happen
Girls: who needs em?
me. the girls here are sooo very nice looking, i fall in love honestly every two minutes when i see any girl. ANY girl. desperation, thy name be steve. no, im not gonna commit any sex crimes (probably) cause thankfully, its getting to be winter time, and they're wrapping up all their juicy presents in coats and sweaters. (i gagged a little typing that)
this phenomen is dangerous. As i have been frequently informed, Austin is the number one place for my demographic to get aids. (my doctor told me most bluntly; "wrap your tool, cause that shit'll getcha".....which is horrifying in and of itself, before you stop and consider my doctor is also my father....)
so, if i want to avoid the junky-plague, ive got to take precautions. after i put my wallet through the wash, i noticed that the rubber i keep in my wallet (i figure a friend might need it, i know i wont) had the packaging warped and was letting air into it. rather that say, "eh...probably works fine" i instead threw it out. Is this a new leaf for Big Boy Steve? p'raps
I also think that preventation starts at the source. so from now on, i need to have a wingman at the bar (im taking applicants now) who comes armed with a stun gun. when i start chatting up some hoodrat who has sores on her mouth and bruises on her arms, my wingman will reach over, and shock me in the raspberries.
Cause that makes much more sense than self-restraint.
cause lets face it, that aint gonna happen
posted by Steve at 10:15 AM
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