well, ok
I am having a really bad bout with insomnia currently. I havent slept since thursday, and its really starting to bug me. Cause i have a stupid song stuck in my head. The worst part is i dont know but maybe 3 lines of lyrics to it. So im stuck cycling the one (obnoxious) part i do know, whilst trying to sleep. Not working out too well.
Last night I had the day off. And it was the best day off ive ever had. I did absolutely nothing productive, added nothing to society, spent no money, and managed to get epically wasted. I started drinking about 6, polished off a bottle of wine, and kept going until about two-fifteen, when a bartender had to wrestle a drink out of my hand. not even kidding.
but it almost turned out to be a sour night
Im pretty good about drinking anything these days, i never gag, or make silly faces anymore. But deep into the night, a drinking buddy bought us all a round of jager meister. Apparently, deer's blood and licorice do not a settled stomach make. I had to sit down (no chairs in this bar, so i was on the floor) for five minutes, trying desperately to not puke in front of hundreds of people.
I figure, even if most of these people are pretty wasted, they are definitely going to remember me, im not exactly every other tom, dick or harry. I'm pretty memorable. so i cant afford to show them a side i dont wish them to remember.
Oh, yeah, so the last bar i went to, i caused a minor scene. We ended up at a bar that featured live music. I was indifferent to any sort of art, as i was looking for two things at that point; a drink in my hand, and a girl with low self-esteem. We walked upstairs, to an area where the band was being broadcast on a big projecter on the wall. Suddenly, i recognized a song. U2's Pride (in the name of love) Bad start, band. let's see what else you got. The next song? also a U2 song. Then, i realize the singer has on wrap-around sunglasses. THIS IS A U2 COVER BAND! FUCK!
I hate U2, i honestly, i have a 30 minute speech prepared on why U2 is the worst thing to happen to humanity in its' many years of existence.
From Bono's painted-on vision on why the world should give a fuck, to The Edge's very naming of himself as a precipice. Ive got so much more, but we have so little time.
I make my way downstairs, abandoning everyone i had come with, and stood in front of the band for one song, mouth agape in disbelief. Why would someone do this? Isnt U2 bad enough already?
After realizing the horror, i took the one route i had left...
I booed this band. Mind you, no one at the bar really gave a shit about this band, they were just a jukebox to them, and the audience was passive about the band being there, softly rocking them to drunken ejaculation.
But i was actively involved in their performance, as i hurled insults at there faux fuck-asses. I was politely asked to keep quiet or leave the premises. So i went back upstairs, where no one knew of my outburst. I kept drinking, and since i was in such a bad mood, quickly drank way-too-much free alcohol and spent 15 minutes trying not to puke as i sat at the top of a busy staircase, blocking pedestrian traffic and being a drunken fire-hazard. It was awesome. Really. Top 5 drinking performances i've ever given.
But i won't ever suffer a U2 cover band so lightly again.
I came up with a great band name. I was driving around, and i passed a scary club that always has a million cop cars in the parking lot.
ready?
Hispanic! at the Disco
It could be anything! sarcastic indie-band, tejano/pop-punk revival band, jam band....its really the most perfect name ever come up with.
and its all mine.
This is really bad, this whole post has taken me three days to write. How did i get so busy by doing absolutely nothing? seriously, i have about four decisions i have to make a day, no more difficult than deciding what food item to put where. Where does my time go?
I think i can wrap this up and still catch a few winks before i head back to my home town for some gutless debauchery and general mayhem (and perhaps some nerdyness of video games, if theres time) I will be home on the 20th, for a week and a half. I will see you there. bring a towel, its about to get messy.
....
gross
night an' shit;
-steve
Last night I had the day off. And it was the best day off ive ever had. I did absolutely nothing productive, added nothing to society, spent no money, and managed to get epically wasted. I started drinking about 6, polished off a bottle of wine, and kept going until about two-fifteen, when a bartender had to wrestle a drink out of my hand. not even kidding.
but it almost turned out to be a sour night
Im pretty good about drinking anything these days, i never gag, or make silly faces anymore. But deep into the night, a drinking buddy bought us all a round of jager meister. Apparently, deer's blood and licorice do not a settled stomach make. I had to sit down (no chairs in this bar, so i was on the floor) for five minutes, trying desperately to not puke in front of hundreds of people.
I figure, even if most of these people are pretty wasted, they are definitely going to remember me, im not exactly every other tom, dick or harry. I'm pretty memorable. so i cant afford to show them a side i dont wish them to remember.
Oh, yeah, so the last bar i went to, i caused a minor scene. We ended up at a bar that featured live music. I was indifferent to any sort of art, as i was looking for two things at that point; a drink in my hand, and a girl with low self-esteem. We walked upstairs, to an area where the band was being broadcast on a big projecter on the wall. Suddenly, i recognized a song. U2's Pride (in the name of love) Bad start, band. let's see what else you got. The next song? also a U2 song. Then, i realize the singer has on wrap-around sunglasses. THIS IS A U2 COVER BAND! FUCK!
I hate U2, i honestly, i have a 30 minute speech prepared on why U2 is the worst thing to happen to humanity in its' many years of existence.
From Bono's painted-on vision on why the world should give a fuck, to The Edge's very naming of himself as a precipice. Ive got so much more, but we have so little time.
I make my way downstairs, abandoning everyone i had come with, and stood in front of the band for one song, mouth agape in disbelief. Why would someone do this? Isnt U2 bad enough already?
After realizing the horror, i took the one route i had left...
I booed this band. Mind you, no one at the bar really gave a shit about this band, they were just a jukebox to them, and the audience was passive about the band being there, softly rocking them to drunken ejaculation.
But i was actively involved in their performance, as i hurled insults at there faux fuck-asses. I was politely asked to keep quiet or leave the premises. So i went back upstairs, where no one knew of my outburst. I kept drinking, and since i was in such a bad mood, quickly drank way-too-much free alcohol and spent 15 minutes trying not to puke as i sat at the top of a busy staircase, blocking pedestrian traffic and being a drunken fire-hazard. It was awesome. Really. Top 5 drinking performances i've ever given.
But i won't ever suffer a U2 cover band so lightly again.
I came up with a great band name. I was driving around, and i passed a scary club that always has a million cop cars in the parking lot.
ready?
Hispanic! at the Disco
It could be anything! sarcastic indie-band, tejano/pop-punk revival band, jam band....its really the most perfect name ever come up with.
and its all mine.
This is really bad, this whole post has taken me three days to write. How did i get so busy by doing absolutely nothing? seriously, i have about four decisions i have to make a day, no more difficult than deciding what food item to put where. Where does my time go?
I think i can wrap this up and still catch a few winks before i head back to my home town for some gutless debauchery and general mayhem (and perhaps some nerdyness of video games, if theres time) I will be home on the 20th, for a week and a half. I will see you there. bring a towel, its about to get messy.
....
gross
night an' shit;
-steve
posted by Steve at 1:20 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home